Middle School Losing IT!

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“I am so thrilled with losing it. I have a 6th grade teacher anxious for me to begin using the series in his room. I also plan to use it in one of the special education classroom.”- Christy Reinhold, California Counselor of the Year

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Don't Be Hot, Don't Be Cold, BeCOOL! Conflict Management

Don’t Be Hot, Don’t Be Cold, BeCOOL! Conflict Management

The essence of conflict management is knowing how to avoid turning a problem they CAN handle into one they CAN’T…

Before your students can handle conflict, they must learn to handle themselves. We can’t control when life will present us with a problem, but we can control how we think about the problem, and how we think about the problem makes all the difference! BeCool: Losing It! will teach your students how to use rational self-talk to put problems in a realistic perspective and to avoid the common thinking mistakes that lead to loss of control and destructive behavior.

Teach your students the latest Self-Talk Tools to rationally manage anger, frustration and rejection.

BeCool: Losing It! will show your students how to use proven self-talk techniques to avoid overreacting to conflict and provocation. Your students will enter the heads of their video peers and watch them model powerful self-talk strategies to cope with situations and people who threaten their cool on the most basic level: through failure, through rejection, and through attacks on their dignity.

Teach your students how to avoid turning a problem they can handle into one they can’t

Students in the late elementary and early middle school years are the most prone of all age groups to exaggeration and distortion of everyday events. The lightest expression of disrespect can trigger a reaction worthy of a declaration of war! Rejection by a classmate, a sharp word from a parent, even everyday frustrations are enough to send a preadolescent into a tailspin, and with overreaction the problem becomes worse. BeCool: Losing It! will teach your students how to control their feelings and avoid turning a problem they can handle into one they can’t.

Instead of Losing It, your students will lean how to “talk themselves out of it!”

In each of the eight vignettes in this series, students will watch a video peer manage their response to provocation by managing their self-talk. They’ll see modeled the use of powerful cognitive techniques such as “imagining consequences” and “rational self-talk” to put provocation and adversity in perspective. When faced with provocation, instead of Losing It and doing something regrettable, your students will learn how to do something smart and “talk themselves out of it.”


Students will learn:

  • ?Powerful self-talk strategies to avoid overreacting to disrespect, frustration and rejection and avoid turning a problem they can handle into one they can’t
  • ?That they are more often victims of their inner talk than of outer events.
  • ?That they have the power to influence how their feelings affect them.
  • ?That they have choices about whose actions and whose words are important to them
  • ?That reality may not be what it seems…it’s important to check out the facts before acting on assumptions.
  • ?To use neutral vs. emotionally loaded language–to themselves and others–when coping with conflict and adversity.
  • ?How self-control builds self-respect
  • ?That self-control is the essence of “Cool”

The BeCool Paradigm is research based and truly works.

Middle School Losing IT! is composed of (4) Modules:



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